The small group of high school ladies I used to lead inspired me to start memorizing James this morning, having finished a fall Bible Study cirriculum. Reading chapter one multiple times, verse 5 really stuck out to me:
The Word: "If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault"
I honestly think it stuck out to me because I want it- and really honestly, I think I want it like Adam and Eve wanted it. I pictured myself knowing what to do in every situation, thinking God had given me a special gift of ministry beign just like Him in the world today- you know...meek, mild, humble, WISE! I volunteer, God, to be your voice whenever there is a disagreement of any kind- lead these other un-wise people here on earth. (Are you catching my sarcastic tone?) I realized I needed to pray today about what true wisdom means, and I got some good counsel when I read "Knowing God" by Packer. I flip it open at the gym and just happen to be on the chapter titled "God's Wisdom and Ours"- coincidence- I think not! Packer uses two transportation analogies to differentiate what wisdom is and is not. He says we are not taken into the 'switchboard room of New York station' and revealed the providential meaning and purpose of the events around us, how God responds and what He is going to do next, rather we are drivers in cars, following set paths. It is not for us to question why the road bends in a certan way, or another driver maneuvers the way they do, but wisdom enables us to see and do the right thing in situations as we drive. Packer also emphasizes the point that wisdom comes from knowing God (hmmm, book title reference?), and part of seeking wisdom is not about my own sort of moral/relational experiments to determine the best outcomes, it is about seeking Him and opening myself up to be changed and directed by Him!
Prayer: To seek God, who is only wise, and be transformed in heart and mind to be more like Him- including being wise.
Food Story: I got home from the gym with my kids and opened the refrigerator to decide what to make for lunch and I saw a few Thanksgiving leftovers that I was really excited to eat. When I remembered it was Tuesday, I was genuinely sad....but I noticed that the feeling didn't last long. I used to have this late realization often (I am a forgetful person), and the disappointment would last all day. One thing I think fasting is teaching me is to not hold on too strongly to earthly desires- food, an event, a plan. Now, I look for and see the joy that is beyond the immediate desire. Thank you, God, for this discipline of fasting, as a symbol of a lot of deeper things you want to discipline in me!
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Still at Work
In case you missed it, I want to fess up that I didn't post last Tuesday. I fasted and prayed but honestly, sadly, nothing was really coming to mind that I felt I could write a few sentences about. All day long I tried to be observant about what was going on around me, read various things, talked to friends, etc. I waited till evening to post, hoping something of great substance would come to mind, and when nothing did, thought I should pray more and sleep on it, surely something would come to mind in the morning...and now it is a week later. Over the weekend I was convicted of this being a 'lukewarm' attitude while reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan. I was not approaching prayer as though it mattered- not believing God in what he says about prayer: it is powerful and effective, He hears it, desires it from us, changes us. This was a great reminder about my attitude and am repenting of my lack of passion and reverence. While I am keeping this in mind more today, I do not consider last week to be a waste, because I trust that even when I fail, God, the author and perfecter of my faith, is still working in me.
The Word: Philippians 1:6 "Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus"
I guess I can't finish this blog without reflecting and recording on thoughts about the Penn State news right now, though I have read so many others that I doubt what I think or feel is new. Relating it to the verse today, I am reminded that God is here, He was there, and will be there- when His children were, and have at many other times, been taken advantage of. He is watching our justice system at work, often times so far from how He will carry out justice. He will be there when these types of injustices continue to happen. We push God farther from us, fail to acknowledge our sinful nature, and weigh right and wrong by the world's standards instead of God's, and we are all suffering the consequences.
Prayer: For glimpses of justice on earth as it will be in Heaven. At the same time,recognizing our own sin and praising God for being so patient with us, desiring that all should be saved,
instead of treating us as our sins deserve.
Food note: I usually limit myself to only fluids on Tuesdays, but at the grocery store today I bough apple cider. I have been wanting buy some for over a month now and just gave in since it was on sale. Today is the hungriest I remember being in the last few months, so after I enjoyed a small glass of apple cider, I realized how much more filling and satisfying it was than other drinks and was tempted to pour another glass. I think for today at least though, I better turn back to just water and not shy away from that feeling of hunger, reminding me that God wants to work in me in many ways.
The Word: Philippians 1:6 "Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus"
I guess I can't finish this blog without reflecting and recording on thoughts about the Penn State news right now, though I have read so many others that I doubt what I think or feel is new. Relating it to the verse today, I am reminded that God is here, He was there, and will be there- when His children were, and have at many other times, been taken advantage of. He is watching our justice system at work, often times so far from how He will carry out justice. He will be there when these types of injustices continue to happen. We push God farther from us, fail to acknowledge our sinful nature, and weigh right and wrong by the world's standards instead of God's, and we are all suffering the consequences.
Prayer: For glimpses of justice on earth as it will be in Heaven. At the same time,recognizing our own sin and praising God for being so patient with us, desiring that all should be saved,
instead of treating us as our sins deserve.
Food note: I usually limit myself to only fluids on Tuesdays, but at the grocery store today I bough apple cider. I have been wanting buy some for over a month now and just gave in since it was on sale. Today is the hungriest I remember being in the last few months, so after I enjoyed a small glass of apple cider, I realized how much more filling and satisfying it was than other drinks and was tempted to pour another glass. I think for today at least though, I better turn back to just water and not shy away from that feeling of hunger, reminding me that God wants to work in me in many ways.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Isaiah 58
In a magazine, I recently heard about live58.org, a movement to end poverty by really living out Isaiah 58. The first thing I did when I heard about this was to of course read Isaih 58. I could talk a lot about this chapter because it has to do with true fasting, but I am still very much praying over it and discerning how to apply it to Sundays, Tuesday fast, And life in general. But one verse in particular came up during today's fast:
The Word:
Isaiah 58:7
"Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter- when you see the naked, to clothe them"
Today I was getting my haircut, fixing a car problem, and generally just having an enjoyable afternoon to myself, thanks to my mom for babysitting during nap time! Normally, on an afternoon out like this, I would really make it a special day and treat myself to some fancy drink, cookie, etc. like they had at the mall where I was getting my hair cut. I paced by the delicious-smelling shop for a while, thinking how rare an occasion this was, I was out of town, no one would know or care if just had one little (or giant) colorful cookie...except
God. And He is really the one who matters. It's not about me being a person who keeps my
commitments, shows restraint, or feels good about myself, it's about growing closer to God and
truly believing that God satisfies. I walked away strengthened in the faith, but still
thought about Isaiah 58 in the sense that true fasting is not about giving something up, it is
about loving and serving others. So after I got my haircut, I pulled out my mom's credit card (thanks for the treat mom!), and I added the tip she said she normally gave. Out of great
thankfulness for her generosity, the peacefulness in the day, general gratitude to God for
drawing me to Himself, especially on this day, I added some money to bless her that I would
have spent on that giant cookie, or something else. I doubt that I was making the difference between her having clothes or food, but if we, as Christians, start truly living in this grateful, generous spirit, many others will be blessed and God will be glorified.
Prayer: For our thankfulness and devotion to God to translate to blessing others and bring Heaven to earth!
The Word:
Isaiah 58:7
"Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter- when you see the naked, to clothe them"
Today I was getting my haircut, fixing a car problem, and generally just having an enjoyable afternoon to myself, thanks to my mom for babysitting during nap time! Normally, on an afternoon out like this, I would really make it a special day and treat myself to some fancy drink, cookie, etc. like they had at the mall where I was getting my hair cut. I paced by the delicious-smelling shop for a while, thinking how rare an occasion this was, I was out of town, no one would know or care if just had one little (or giant) colorful cookie...except
God. And He is really the one who matters. It's not about me being a person who keeps my
commitments, shows restraint, or feels good about myself, it's about growing closer to God and
truly believing that God satisfies. I walked away strengthened in the faith, but still
thought about Isaiah 58 in the sense that true fasting is not about giving something up, it is
about loving and serving others. So after I got my haircut, I pulled out my mom's credit card (thanks for the treat mom!), and I added the tip she said she normally gave. Out of great
thankfulness for her generosity, the peacefulness in the day, general gratitude to God for
drawing me to Himself, especially on this day, I added some money to bless her that I would
have spent on that giant cookie, or something else. I doubt that I was making the difference between her having clothes or food, but if we, as Christians, start truly living in this grateful, generous spirit, many others will be blessed and God will be glorified.
Prayer: For our thankfulness and devotion to God to translate to blessing others and bring Heaven to earth!
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